You're in! That way we're both giving up equal amounts of time and money to check things out, and see if things will work out and if we want to do it again. This is just the truth, it might be a little weird suggesting you go dutch. The check arrives — who is going to pay? Things are going well. Your email address will not be published. If I am dating a man and I am making more or less the same money as he is, then there is absolutely no reason for him to be always paying for things. Some couples, however, are very comfortable with the decision to go Dutch, especially during early casual dates.


To go dutch or not to go dutch? Turns out, it's really not that simple. What does going Dutch mean? In modern lingo, it means the man paying on dates, the first date especially. While it's always fun to be treated by anyone, date or friend, for many, when you go Dutch on a date, it seems like the "right" thing to do. It's not only fair, but seems completely normal in a society where the majority of people, no matter their gender, have an income. However, there are other first date tips that explain that expecting the man to pay on a date makes sense, especially due to the wage gap. Why shouldn't he pick up the tab? It would even things out a bit, after all. Basic math, right there. After that, splitting works.

In previous posts, I discussed how one should pay for date nights. Do you go dutch or does one person pay for everything? In all this talk, I failed to explain the concept of going dutch; foreign to both the Swedes and the Dutch. What is this funny idea from the lower country called The Netherlands? First, I did a little research on the history of going, the popularity of it in different countries, and then what people think of it. According to the Wikipedia entrywhich unfortunately has been marked as full of weasel language, the definition is a bit nebulous.

The phrase did probably originate in Holland because people pay for their own share when going out in groups. Makes sense to me. But on dates, or one-on-one events, the should dating couples go dutch usually pays for the meal food and drinks. Standard etiquette says that the inviter pays for see more meal. Equality etiquette states that the man and woman pay for their own share. In Sweden, the practice of splitting the bill in restaurants is common.

In a courtship situation where both parts have a similar financial standing, which is commonplace in Sweden, the traditional custom of the man always paying in restaurants has largely fallen out of use and is by many, including etiquette authorities[who? Generally a romantic couple will take turns paying the bill or split it. It is generally assumed that everyone pays for himself or herself in restaurants unless the invitation stated otherwise.

From Twitter: souldate : to pity, philippines dating sorry a restaurant by only paying exactly for what you had.

But then, the majority of women here have been part of the work force since the 70s. At least. How about that, huh? Sapphire: wee! AN: do i think they should walk around naked on the first date? I mean…maybe…if its hot outside. She pays. LBO american girl married to a Swede in Sweden : i like it. It makes everyone equal. I enjoy myself more if I pay my share. But well, if a guy brings a girl on a date, i think the guy should pay. To sum it up: there should dating couples go dutch no good answer to it.

Going dutch depends on the guy, should dating couples go dutch girl, and the circumstances around the date. Seemingly normal girls can go insane if they must pay their own way. Chivalrous attitudes required by men are neither arcane nor unnecessary.

Women should truly take pity on men, as they have no idea what is acceptable and what is not. If I were a man, I would take her to a good restaurant nothing fancy and pay for that first date.

If she seems like the type that wants everything paid for, then be prepared and face the wallet consequences. Otherwise, if you are girl on a date, make the effort to take part in the expenses. Sometime I pay for ice with dating someone with attention deficit disorder think or drinks if we go to another place after dinner.

Whether America or Sweden or somewhere in between, there should be some equality between the sexes. A rule of thumb is to think of how the dinner was decided. Then the person who invited, chose restaurant and so on should pay. Here in that case I agree that if a guy invites a girl out on a date, he should pay for it.

But I would also expect the girl to reciprocate now and then and take the initiative, whether it be an invitation to a restaurant dinner, a home cooked one or something else. My treat. With the addition that someone who wants everything paid for, all the time, does not interest me at all.

I need to be able to respect a potential partner as an equal. Not something to bring into the 21st century. If I am dating a man and I am making more or less the same money as he is, then there is absolutely no reason for him to be always paying for things.

If however, one of us is making significantly more money than the other person then I think it would be ok if the richer person pays more often should dating couples go dutch on income differences, not sex. I would do it anyway, if I were the one making the big bucks. It has almost always been dutch or me fronting the money…. Its a huge turn off. If a guy invites a girl click the following article he should pay.

That being said it could be anything from Coffee to a gourmet meal. It is not the amount that counts to most women but the gesture. The first few dates is really where I think that men should take the initiative as far as paying goes.

After that it should be equal. Pontus- Thanks for your input. And I agree, if someone invites you out for dinner, that person should pay. But at the same time, if you happen to be a girl, it is okay to ask a men out to dinner and for the GIRL to pay. I agree with the point that the person who makes more money could a little more often.

Unfortunately in the US the income inequality between sexes is much bigger than it is in Sweden. But I also pay for girlfriends who are still in college and have little disposable income. Do you think it steams from the fact that women seem see more invested in dates so men pay for the first few?

Or something else? I would just like to clarify something here about the term Dutch treat. I have no idea where it sprang from, but after living here in Holland for 16 years I have never been on a date casual or otherwise and was expected to pay by the guy. They have never asked me to pay and ofcurse there were times that I took a turn to pay. I also feel very uncomfortable and guilty if the guy pays all the time. In Holland, the Dutch are under the impression that there is such a thing as an American party where people have to bring drinks to a party or something.

This is quite puzzling because all the parties I have been to in Holland have all been fully catered by the people throwing the party.

They think this is how it happens in America…. The Dutch, however, seem to be rapidly approaching the Scandinavian should dating couples go dutch where the woman are very equal to the men and the woman will insist on paying her share. I think this is a shame as it really does mess up the difference between men and women and then you need blogs to help us out when we go out with the opposite sex on a date! Women that sit around waiting to be helped out by men constantly… Not sure if others agree, but that is the closest I can come up with.

Expecting men to whos karl guess dating more often if they have more money is ridiculous. Why would you go out to dinner if you were struggling financially? If I earn 75k and you earn 35k, what exactly matchless dating site players were stopping you from paying your half of the dinner bill?

Would a dinners bankrupt you?

It would be no different than if you ate dinner alone. You would still be paying your half. Of course not. Until that is equally balanced, that system is not in favor of men.

Should dating couples go dutch still allows women to get free meals because they were not willing to ask a man out. Get used to this, ladies. This is only the beginning. Well here is a little scenario, have been dating a girl for a month, and on the first date I paid for everything which was fine, and again on the second date.

This again up set her, I enquired was it because you could not afford this, I was understanding due to her job situation and said maybe we could leave it another couple of weeks then I could pay, at this point but was a little short on cash The answer was a blank no, she was annoyed because I had even asked. Otherwise, if u had money for train tickets, but not the hotel, why didnt u invite her over to london and stay at yours?

If a woman wants your company, she will pay half. Way to many gold diggers out there who just want a free lunch. And way to many guys think with their penis, so they pay. Only later to realize they was being taken for a chump. The best test for a gold digger is insist on splitting the bill on the first date, if she looks shocked gold digger move on. If she is fine with it she has passed the test.

NO you dont, so why do the same on a date? Use your brain not your penis. Do you realize that it is people like you who make sure that women will never have the same respect or status as men?!

Personally I do not sell either my body or my company for money. Your email address will not be do not hook up kelly clarkson lyrics. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.